Before heading off to college, Greek life was the last thing on my mind. I had Pulitzer aspirations. And as a direct admit to one of the best journalism schools in the country, social and fraternal organizations were outside of my tunnel vision. And over time I learned that being an accomplished Black kid from St. Louis at a predominantly White institution made me a prime candidate for every Black organization on campus, Greek or otherwise.
The best way to combat this is to remember, your place Pledging a black sorority at this moment — is a Neo. The learning curve will be easier to ride, whereas resistance will make it rough. And right on time too. I was humiliated. No one ever laid a finger on me or said an unkind word during my intake process or since. I could feel the stares of other Black students on campus who knew I had been on line. I could see welts and bruises forming around my knuckles.
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Life Member, plus 17 uninterrupted years of active, financial, service to my sorority. Some of the girls on my line were my closest friends, how would this impact them? Post to Cancel. They instructed us to line up and somehow, and I was forced to the front of the line. But all too often, aspirants pursue their interest in entirely the wrong ways. As the nights continued, the anxiety grew. Some Latina sororities step as well. Your relationship with the member and his or her relationship to the organization means that he or she knows what he or she can and cannot do for you as a prospective applicant. Pledging a black sorority with my two closest Pledging a black sorority, we found ourselves enthralled with these young women, our prophytes. And Battle bulge define line collapsed.
Whether it was the death of Robert Champion within the FAMU Marching a fraternity of sorts outside of the Divine 9 or the increasing visibility of hazing incidents at predominantly white institutions PWIs and historically black colleges and universities HBCUs , the spotlight on pledging is here to stay.
- All across the nation, there are excited collegians preparing their applications for membership to a black sorority or fraternity.
- Because of negative associations with words like "pledge," many sororities have chosen to adopt new language.
- Before heading off to college, Greek life was the last thing on my mind.
All across the nation, there are excited collegians preparing their applications for membership to a black sorority or fraternity. But all too often, aspirants pursue their interest in entirely the wrong ways.
Check yourself. Are your grades together? Do you have the financial resources? Image matters. This includes cleaning up your social media platforms. Bathroom selfies, throwing up middle fingers and checking-in at the club are not good looks.
Good branding also includes observing good personal hygiene and daily grooming. Serve others. Demonstrate a genuine commitment to service. Fraternity and sorority members immediately assume that you only served to be eligible for membership. Good recommendation letters. Ask the person if they can give you a strong, positive recommendation letter.
This should not be assumed. Your relationship with the member and his or her relationship to the organization means that he or she knows what he or she can and cannot do for you as a prospective applicant. Building relationships the forgotten piece of the puzzle.
Ideally, because you express an interest in a service organization, a member should, by example, be serving. Even if all else fails, if the member thinks you are a good candidate, he or she will tell you what she can and cannot do for you—this includes writing your letter. Who wants an applicant with no standards? Not me. Things will work out in your favor. Pledging a graduate chapter also has its benefits.
I assume Dr. What may seem trivial to some has been deemed an important aim for our organizations to overcome past failures and invest in continuing our legacy. Dear So Unique, I see you coming for me. Who are you and what do you offer your organization—should you be a member of one? Lets set a good example by not entering into an epic battle of back and forth on matters neither of us know anything about.
It is the meaning we give to words that makes all the difference. Case closed. Good stuff. Too bad the part about getting your ass beat and self worth lowered is missing.
This is a huge issue on many HBCU campuses. My own Alma Mater constantly has Divine 9 suspensions due to people being rushed to the hospital frequently during pledging season. Try being realistic in your representation so that young people get an honest overview. Dear Sunshine, Thank you for the compliment …I think there was something flattering in there early on. No one can beat you or lower your self worth unless you let them.
No one ever laid a finger on me or said an unkind word during my intake process or since. And my self-esteem is higher than ever! The problem your comment suggests, is with the organizations.
Organizations, like businesses, churches and families are made up of people. The people make all the difference. Violence is an unfortunate outcome of poor uses of power and poor utilization of the many, many other options available to us.
Have standards and keep them high. Say that sunshine! On my college campus they were the bottom of the barrel when it came to class, humility, maturity, promoting free-thinking, and maintaining peace on campus.
Many of your criticisms are not without merit. We have to do a better job. I owe nothing to some inane college club, pleaseeeeee ….. For example, on my campus 7 of the 9 NHPC orgs were suspended at some point over the last 3 years.
No other organization on campus was suspended doing that same time frame. I agree Dr. It is okay to not be apart of something that thinks it is…. This demands that adults stand up for what is right. Kudos to you. Words, via the meaning we give them, matter very much. Your financial commitment and involvement in your sorority is exactly what sorority life is about.
Out-lawing the words hazing and line has not, and will not, eradicate hazing—which is what promoted the change in language on the national level, but changed little to nothing on the chapter level.
Further, it has changed nothing in the public sphere. But this is only my opinion. This post is designed to guide Black Greek-lettered sorority and fraternity aspirants; it can only do that if it is accessible to them. My daughter recently transfered from aHBCU right after pledging. She is currently the one AKA on campus. Dear Ms. Woods, I would advise your daughter on concentrating on establishing herself academically, before she does anything as socially time-consuming as being responsible for an intake process.
As a student, her first duty is to her academic success. While it would be wonderful to be a part of bringing the chapter back to the campus, she does have bigger responsibilities, which I would advise her to meet first. Great article and great suggestions. Especially as we talk about the use of language to describe our organizations. For instance the word hazing is overdone.. I would love to see how we can press this dialogue even further..
It is merely one step, in the right direction. If they are ill prepared they are not membership material. Clark, Thank you reading and for your feedback. I take my BGLO membership seriously; so seriously in fact, that I am committed to growing the ranks of BGLOs with good members, not just with well-connected aspirants who get in because of who they know. And, finally, the principles of this post can and should easily be applied to other aspirantions—including how to get a job.
Like any other how-do guide, any one who reads this post, still has to do the work! Do not however, feel like you have to be a doormat to anyone.
Good sorority members respect, look for and celebrate high achieving students, who are actively serving others. Concentrate on those things first. At the end of the day, groups like BGLOs are inherently social in nature. This means that the people in them have the final say about who they let in and who they keep out.
I hope this helps. I have come across your post and am thankful that it is here, although I wish it had been written when I was in college. I did not try to join a sorority in my early years of school. I was like you and did not understand what a BGLO was or what the differences were between the four sororities.
When I did my research and was ready to get to know the people in the organizations, they had been suspended from campus and I graduated never joining one.
Now that I have community service and other experiences under my belt, I am, again, interested in joining, but have no idea how to go about the alumnae chapters, but I will continue to search and learn. I am thankful you made this post so that girls now who are like me in my college days, have an idea of what to do and how to go about joining the best sorority for them.
It is so crucial for these young adults their first year. Thanks so much for reading. First, be active in your community. Serve first. Seek out the sorority chapter second.
But beyond anything else, remember that sorority life is about demonstrated service. Crystal, I just think you are beautiful.
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Queening sorority babe hazing ebony babe 5 min Badboymovies - 16k Views -. At the end of the day, groups like BGLOs are inherently social in nature. Say that sunshine! Pledge pussy licking and toying 5 min Sarah-m - Concentrate on those things first. Would our friendship endure without the sorority?
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Pledging A Black Greek-Letter Organization Gave Me PTSD | MadameNoire
Marketing Freak. Frankie Bev Fanatic. Here are 9 truths our Neos need to know, but we rarely get to tell them:. What org? What school did you cross at? What Year? How many did you have on your line? It could also be because no one has ever really asked them about post-process life outside of prospects inquiring about programs. The meat of our existence is based on you making an even stronger presence after your probate mask comes off.
Highlight the programs that are making a difference on your campus. Got one better for you: ask your Prophytes and Old Heads what their favorite programs are and why. Probe them about what made it special and how they were able to execute events effectively and successfully. Then, populate your future conversations with those talking points.
Divulge the things that make your organization purposeful AND popular. We have a responsibility to represent our founders and their mission to full capacity and the best of our ability. Now, that does not void out fun. You are not only Frank or Sandra. If you feel like you might be on another tip for the night, refrain from wearing your letters and colors just to keep it careful.
Do you, but be mindful. We ask you to be accountable because our whole existence depends on it. That means there is no room for error. We have stakeholders, investors and community contributors who partner with us financially and socially. Along with our dues and fundraising efforts, collectively, they help us keep our organizations afloat.
Each suspension, expulsion, sub-par academic standing, hazing incident, petty politicking, and negative perception of any member, chapter or organization hurts our pockets. Fraternities and Sororities take a huge hit when they have to pay for pledging lawsuits, lose prospects to other organizations and members drop off after graduation to skip Grad Chapter all together. Businesses run off of 3 things: their reputation, their employees and their consumers. If employees are displaying a poor image of what the organization represents, the reputation of the brand becomes tainted and undesirable, thus resulting in a digression of potential members, sponsors, investors, etc.
Do everything you can to counteract this. Aint nobody got time for shade. If you have an issue with decisions made, vote. If necessary, go to your Grad adviser. If you have to voice a concern, you can talk to your chapter members.
But if you do, keep it factual and less based on hearsay. Gossip breeds dissension, division and distrust. Talk it out. Compromise when needed. Learn how to agree to disagree when necessary. They might be great people, they just have a big mouth. Accept them as they are, swerve them when it comes to certain info. If someone is abusing their authority and it is becoming a hindrance to the chapter, talk to the proper uppers in order to handle the situation.
And all the while, keep it inside the chapter. All of us make mistakes, including your Prophytes. There will be times when you find us in a compromising position. This is when you tap into the potential we saw inside of you and your line. Challenge yourself. Challenge each other to be a step above our level. Sometimes, we lack because our priors lacked and we reflect the slack they displayed.
Learn from our mistakes. What we neglect to do is remember how it felt when we were fresh on the yard. Ask us questions about what it takes to run a chapter. Inquire about how we can do better and where we can implement these improvements. This will make us step our game up, take us out of our little world and expand our vision beyond the chapter. Our legacies are dependent on what you take in today.
We chose you for a reason: potential. Whether that potential is fully grown or needs some development, we saw it in you. Take initiative.
Problem solve. Fill our voids. You are the leaders of yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Find your groove and blaze your path. Another reason why we picked you is because you add a unique twist to our story line. Never lose that. Also, if you ever feel that Greek Life is impeding on important things in your life romantic relationships, spiritual relationships, friendships, grades, health, opportunities, sanity, etc , feel free to take a breather.
We want you to be whole and balanced as possible. Analyze, prioritize and revitalize if you need to step away. We understand you have a life outside of Greekdom or you should have one. I mean, we coo-right? However, we do want to be a part of your life, not the end all-be all of your social activities. Your pre-Greek friends were riding with you before we were. Even though your process is over, you are never, ever, eva-eva-eva done with learning.
There is always something new to take in. Trinkets from history will pop up. Revised and refined ways to do things will be introduced. Greek Life will challenge you and it will come with some interestingly tough jabs. The best way to combat this is to remember, your place — at this moment — is a Neo. You are in the seed phase. In order to get to that point, you need nurturing, training and time.
The moment you do, that leaves the door of divine opportunity wide open. The learning curve will be easier to ride, whereas resistance will make it rough.
Mentors who will help you avoid the potholes of the post-process and boost your appeal in the Greek world and beyond. Let us help you so we can elevate our orgs together, mk? Hit me up on Twitter, Facebook or IG!